…mozemoua…

My review on “3 Lub Tooj Npab” (The 3 Bracelet)

Posted on 07 February 2009

watch trailer here

 

How should I start with my review on this movie? So far I’ve only watched the long 4 hour episode, and yes, it was all in one part. 4 hours in one part? Now, if it was out Thai Lakorn, we don’t mind that what so ever, but in this case, I thought differently. I’ve read many comments on this movie before I decided to watch it. Many comments I’ve read were not the best, but hey, everyone has their own opinion right? So from what I’ve heard the second and lets hope last episode will come out maybe this summer.

 

So I was able to get a friend of mine to give me a copy of this movie and when he did gave me the copy the only comment he had made was “Don’t forget to bring a pillow and a blanket with you, you’ll fall asleep within 15 minutes into the movie”. Of course knowing this friend of mine I just brushed off his comment and know that well he has to be right, he can exaggerate on a lot of things, but most time, well they happen to be true, so far at least.

 

So I started watching this movie, and yes I did prepared my pillow and my blanket, actually, I didn’t really have to prepare it, I was watching it on my laptop on my bed so I had them all right there already.

 

So the introduction to the movie was decent, we have the main character Kalia walking home introducing herself with a voice over. Okay, not bad, not bat at all. But then the first thing I notice was that well, it wasn’t professionally taped. The quality wasn’t anywhere close to great; there were way too many lens flares. Sorry I cannot stand lens flares; I guess that’s the photographer in me speaking. And then the second thing I notice was, the acting, the acting was dreadful, awfully dreadful, on top of that this was suppose to be a Hmong movie, well all the actors and actress had the WORST Hmong accent I had ever heard. Their accents as well were dreadful. Again, I heard so many mistakes in their pronunciation that it bugged me so much. I think not any single actor or actress in this movie was able to speak without mispronouncing a word.  I also notice that some of the characters sounded like they were speaking straight from a script with no emotion at all, it was so unnatural. Now that bugged the bananas out of me. I was getting so annoyed by the way they mispronounced the words.

 

Another thing I notice and was so bugged by was, I am assuming all these characters are suppose to be humm, let’s say around 22-30 years of age. Well my first notion was, humm, well Jack does not look like he should be working in a businesses thus he only looks 16, does he even know how to count to 100 and his abc’s?. Michael looks like he is only uhh 21, Daniel looks like he is only 22, blah, they all looks like they are only 21-22 years of age. Now that bugs me. Once again, the acting was awfully dreadful.

 

The character Kalia annoys the bananas out of me, it’s her voice. I couldn’t stand her voice, or more like the way she speaks, how she’s contently having that loud tone of voice. It was once again dreadful. And again, so many lens flare. Sorry I don’t think I’ll get past all the lens flares.

 

This movie did not click; it was a total mess, or again, a dreadful mess. What can I say? I have to say what I think and it seems like from the start of the movie, it had already fallen apart. There were so many characters that it also confused the living bananas out of me. I kept asking myself, okay so who is who? Huh? What? Uhh? I was left dumbfounded, and I hate being left dumbfounded.

 

A part that left me confused for a minute there was, well the part when they all were having dinner at a friends house, sorry, like I’ve said, I don’t know who’s who, so I have no idea who’s the house belong to. But Michael took Kalia to the dinner as his date, okay, not a bad idea, but then one of the girl there spilt wine on Kalia, both Kalia and Michael went to wash it off, then Daniel showed up and asked for Michael, so I am assuming they both knows each other and then Daniel received an emergency phone call so had to leave before Kalia and Michael came back down, how long does it take to wash up a spill? As I’ve said, so we assume that Daniel and Michael know each other, but it happened that they don’t funny stuff eh? Well I then learn that they don’t know each other because well they helped each other out in a lame fight. And that’s how they first met, blah, that was lame.

 

Another confusing part was after they had helped each other out, they met a French Gypsy, okay no problem with that, so the two man bought the three bracelet from her, there was only two of them, but then all the sudden towards the end of the episode instead of two guys splitting the bracelets between the two of them, another guy who was a friend happened to also received one. Uhh, okay? I felt stupid at that part because all the sudden the third friend had a bracelet too.

 

Okay so the part where they were having a meeting with their contractors or whatever they were, the character Blong decides to come in and crash their meeting. Its funny how normally we hear of party crashers or perhaps wedding crasher, but this was a meeting crasher? PUAHAHA… Okay now really, in a real business not anyone can just barge in like that especially at an important meeting. Anything after that I had no idea what was going on, I felt like they were talking gibberish because they just started throwing names and date out there. The only thing that I felt was WHAT?? HUH? Okay whatever.

 

OMG, the part where the character Allison slipped and had her miscarriage cracked the living bananas out of me. Dude, the fall was so fake and un-convincible, and the blood was too dark to be blood, it looks like they had just thrown a bunch of A1 sauce on the floor. The blood does not dry up that quick to begin with since that is the only time that blood turns dark. The blood looks like it’s been on the floor and caused the slipped instead of the blood that came out of her.

 

Ahh, what was up with the character Blong’s hair? Goodness, his hair looks like he had just come out of a nasty tsunami; it was all over the place. Do they not check their appearance before filming? Sorry but dude needed a hair cut, oh and Michael’s hair makes him look like one of the super scians (sorry not sure of the correct spelling, lol) from Dragon Ball Z.

 

Oh and Jack, what was up with his body guard? Is he a prince that needed to be guard at all times? Or how about his assistance that tried to stop him from drinking at the uhh bar, if I can even call it that. First of all is he even old enough to be drinking?

 

Ahh, my head hurts thinking of this movie, it’s that dreadful. So because I am critiquing this movie I guess I’ll have to give my rating. I give this movie a 1 out of 5 for effort. I give props to all the characters and the production crew, but still it was dreadful.

 

I honestly thought this would have been a good movie if only there wasn’t so much nonsense going on and the dialog was a bit better. The concept of the movie wasn’t so bad, it was how they cast the movie that was horrifying.

 

I am sorry if I had offended anyone on my review. I am the viewer and this is my opinion of what I thought. If it offended anyone, I am sorry. But maybe they can take this piece of advice and maybe use it for the future as a reference, I am only critiquing it, take it as a constructive criticism.